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Pulp Daggerlord
We are not a guild - we are not an organization. A group of 12 year olds sent to contain your filth, and contain it we shall - even in paragraph-length responses. ''- Plup Daggerlord during the conquest for pixels. Plup Daggerlord (birth name Benedict Augustine) was the alt (incarnation) of Billy Hullbatten, one of the founding members of the EITC along with Pablo Swordmaster and Giratina and The Sky Warrior. There isn't much information about his past, other than he has been around for a long time and has undying fanboyism over Lord Cutlery Bucket. He is from a much simpler, more purified and golden age of the EITC that literally everyone has forgotten; a brown text crude league of grey mercenaries and reversed assassins who occupied the Caribbean in the shadow of Lord Cutlery Bucket tasked with exterminating pixel pirates from the Caribbean - I.e. The Black Guard. Daggerlord was the most nihilistic, and referred to all pirates as "pirate insects". He generally worked as fanboy to various leaders throughout the ages. He became widely renowned as Beckett's top fanboy, and was awarded a Cutlery Set of knives upon becoming his successor when he ascended to Fanboy Prime of the EITC. He became so skilled with the art of the stumpt blade that he eventually took on the name Daggerlord. A name that would come to be met with groans as he tended to use the keyboard as his ally to disarm unsuspecting pixel pirates. He took this as his official surname, along with his lordship. He stood the test of time, living through the civil wars and the rise of The British Empire (signalizing the destruction of the EITC's status as an independent militia), and believed as one of the last founding members of the EITC still alive. He is of the few people with whom the memories of the golden age still remain, and thus one of the only few capable of passing it on to the new generation ensuring the survival of the Black Guard. He lead one of the original EITC guilds from many years ago, a long forgotten guild which was the one he first joined at the beginning of his career - Black Mercenary. Heritage Plup Daggerlord, 14, was the son of Billy Hullbatten 45, (deceased EITC lord LOL) and Mommy Goldtimbers, 42, who sat on the Privy Council of her uncle's Great Britain, along with her brother James Goldtimbers. She ruled the EITC Through her two sons Plup Daggerlord and Orange Juice Daggerlord, real names Benedict and Marcus Goldtimbers, as her sons were undyingly loyal to her. (Plup was an alt account possessed by Mommy, and Orange Juice is Plup's second in command... whatever that means), and so she spent most of her time channeling her power this way from afar, as she resided in the core of England and rarely left the Prime Minister's palace. She spent her time receiving lectures from her father and maintaining her family's position, as well as surviving within the competitive grounds of the British Empire royalty. She was otherwise very close to her brother, which causes some to speculate that Billy Hullbatten may not be the father of the two Daggerlord children after all, and that they were incestous bastards. This claim has been revoked, however, as attempts to weaken the Daggerlord's legal claim to the EITC, which Mommy said makes sense as there are constantly deviants attempting to take it for themselves. Mommy had the Black Guard represent the power of Great Britain through her two sons, spanning into the Caribbean, as a feared militia of prepubescents who were exceedingly armed to be a "trolling company". Aside from oppressing pixel pirates, another way the Black Guard represented Britain's interests was by supervising the events of every nation, including weddings, ceremonies, etc, in order to make EITC presence known throughout the Caribbean, using the fact that it is the ideology of the Black Guard from which nation guilds originated from, to gain publicity. As a result, Black Mercenary has grew to such an extent within such little time that it's armada was a force to be reckoned with. The Return of the EITC Golden Age It began with the EITC rebelling against the crown under William Brawlmartin, an unworthy and weak leader who kept loose ties with Britain and plotted with the former EITC Lord, Samuel Redbeard, who Billy Hullbatten once served, over the course of 1 year to legitimize the EITC under him so that the former Lord Marshall could eventually return and seize it. Brawlmartin failed to achieve likeability, or even a strong standing EITC guild, for it was inactive. The Attempted Assassination of Johnny Goldtimbers When Samuel Harrington had finally made his return, he and William Brawlmartin were ready to rebel and unveil their true intentions to reform the EITC as a private militia, by committing treason and attempting to execute the Prime Minister of Great Britain and Ireland. Samuel, William, and other members of their court of directors entered Johnny's lounge with the intention of killing him and escaping before the guards could notice. The Prime Minister defended himself against the 4 treacherous EITC lords, facing all of them alone using his unorthodox fencing style, stating, "it's treason, then" and bellowing a mighty screech. After dispatching two of the falsehood lords, Johnny Goldtimbers ultimately survived the attack suffering a scarring wound to the left nut. William and Samuel then escaped to further their plans. The crumbling of William Brawlmartin's Regime "''Remember, remember the 1st of November... The EITC treason and plot. I know of no reason, the EITC treason should ever be forgot." ''- A recovered Johnny Goldtimbers during the parliamentary act of November 1st, 1750, to dissolve the EITC on the dawn of No Nut November. The vote was a success, with the majority of Britain voting to repeal the EITC and hunt down Samuel Harrington's rebellion. Nobody knew what would come next, what was certain, however, was that a war was coming... Mommy Goldtimbers left the parliament session with mixed feelings, as not only had her father nearly been killed, but she was just recovering from a state of shame with her son, Benedict, being non Plup-free, combined with all that her late husband had worked for - the EITC over the course of nearly ten years, being torn down after a brief period of inactivity and reckless intimate relationships. The Return of Black Mercenary Thinking herself at rock bottom now, with nothing left of dignity, by luck she had one possession left - one of the old EITC guild names from the golden age, Black Mercenary, which she gave to her alt Plup Daggerlord. Since the EITC legally didn't exist anymore, and all that was left was a terrorist group under what Mommy saw as a weaker guildname (East India Co.), she figured Plup could use the prestige of the guildname Black Mercenary alone to bring back the old ways of the EITC, something Samuel and William noticeably couldn't do. He began by recreating the old EITC uniform, furnishing a secret formula for buyable black yoga pants to go along with the infamous black dingy long coat glitch, which most people already knew of. What they didn't know is the Krabby Patty secret formula to the Black Guard Breeches, as he calls it - and intended to make it a guild secret. If they joined Black Mercenary, they could finally bear the true colors of Beckett's Assassins! This proved to be successful when Orange Juice Daggerlord, his future Co. Gm was first inspired and asked him how to get it. (Originally he was not sent by Mommy to accompany the brother). After telling him the secret and introducing him to what he had planned, Orange Juice trusted his ability to bring back the old ideology of the EITC, and would assist him in recruiting for Black Mercenary, using the flashy secret outfits to catch attention. This combined with the guildname ensured tremendous success, with the guild amassing an army of new EITC mercenaries in uniform within just two days. - The theory was correct, the name Black Mercenary did carry influence - as did the leadership of Plup and Orange Juice Daggerlord, now second in command of the newly formed company. The EITC already had a functioning ranking chain, cunning recruiters and professional formation units. It was not long before Plup began organizing Black Mercenary to protect Britain during guild meetings - and they noticed, and were impressed. ''"Professional! Bringing back the old ways of the EITC." ''- Lord Maximillion Phillipe Beckett, November 4th 1750, during a guarded meeting between The Prime Minister and the King of Spain. Very soon Black Mercenary began to be recognized by the British Empire as the newly formed Black Guard, as a replacement of Brawlmartin's regime. But the threat of war still remained - Samuel and William still lurked, and Plup realized that Black Mercenary must have no rivals, or it will not grow. With an army at his back and Black Mercenary surpassing the success of Samuel's rebellion, Plup found himself pressured into transferring Black Mercenary into their rebel guild, East India Co. Deal with The Devil In order to get out of this argument while still keeping Black Mercenary free of enemies, Plup sought help from Mommy to forge a plan while he was cornered, Mommy emphasized to Samuel and Brawlmartin that under the oppression of the British Empire, East India Co. could not grow, and it wouldn't make a difference if Plup joined them. However, Black Mercenary had the support of Britain due to sheer impression and awe at the guild, and so a deal was struck - Mommy suggested Samuel and William stand down as a distraction while Black Mercenary grows strong from Britain's support, and then the guild would be given to Samuel and the spotlight would be stolen from Britain, as Plup's bloodline stems from Billy Hullbatten, who had a long history of serving Samuel in the olden days, which Mommy used a lie stating that she wishes to "avenge her husband", causing Samuel to ''trust ''her to honor her end of the deal - a mistake. The rebel lords were reluctant, but admitted the strategy was their only hope. Meanwhile, Mommy had already paid Britain an incomparable debt by using an alt in Samuel's guild, whom was an Officer, to give an unlimited invite code to her father, the Prime Minister, allowing him to flood it with spies. In return, this granted Black Mercenary infinite withdrawals from the Bank and the militia's full support of the country. Mommy's proposal with the rebel EITC lords began to discourage Brawlmartin, seeing that they truly could not build their guild in the face of Britain and that trusting Mommy was his only hope - someone he hated. This ended up causing Brawlmartin to abandon all hope and hand East India Co. over to Britain, betraying Samuel with his weakness thus winning Britain the war and reducing the rebels to nothing. Mommy managed to cause all of this with just one conversation, and thus was rewarded for her endeavours by being appointed to the Privy Council of Great Britain, with her son Plup Daggerlord representing the EITC united with the crown under the old ways, thus completing Mommy's rise to power. Return of the EITC Founder Shortly after Britain's tremendous victory due to Mommy's political cunningness, Pablo Swordmaster had come online for the first time in seemingly ages. Black Mercenary now stronger than ever, and Swordmaster a wise supporter of Britain. Plup Daggerlord was eager to show Pablo Swordmaster that the legacy he began in 2008 flourishes under his rule. He did this by presenting a guild wall of his mercenaries, signifying the EITC guild's prestigious military strength. - This had all been done within a few days. Very impressed and pleased, the founding EITC Lord agreed to join Black Mercenary in order to watch his legacy flourish under the new leader, as a trusted officer. Plup now had the advisory of the very first; the father. The EITC was secure. Mommy's Coronation as ruler of the Black Guard, through alt (son), Plup Daggerlord. ''It is on this day, th at after seizing the EITC in order to reform it to it's golden days, that Plup Daggerlord reunited with Pablo Swordmaster - the founder off of which the EITC was built upon, and has obtained his valuable advisory and counsel and thus after many years finally reunited the EITC, and has promised to continue to lead it in the legendary vision that Pablo Swordmaster had in the beginning with him at his side. Long may he reign - '' Continued Rule As leader of the flourishing Black Guard, Plup Daggerlord became widely renown for conducting his "Daily EITC Occupations of Tortuga" in order to remind pirates of whom truly is in control of the Caribbean. He spent countless hours training with his mercenaries, creating a militia of skilled assassins, both by land and sea, as the Black Guard has, for the first time since the golden age, a functioning armada. From receiving lectures by his mother throughout the duration of his entire life, it was ingarined into Plup Daggerlord's mind that the EITC is all that matters, as many years ago it was only after people saw that the EITC was already claimed that they started contemplating nation guilds. He has proven his mother's teachings true by emphasizing under his rule that it is far easier to build an EITC guild with an original name than a nation, as the idea is more popular and relevant, which means that the only true threat to the success of an EITC guild was another guild of such nature, which was why he was willing to ally Black Mercenary with as many guilds as possible, but if another guild should attempt to copy it in any form, they were to be destroyed in order to protect his mother's stable rule. Plup Daggerlord was so closely in touch with his mother during his leadership of the EITC, that some speculated he was just a puppet subjected to a mere lift of her finger, and that he acted what Mommy thought, but this is simply due to the fact that Plup was taught how to rule by Mommy from his first day, resulting in the parent always being superior. One of the founders of the former Black Mercenary from 1741, Nathaniel Scurvyskull, came out of retirement to offer his wisdom to Plup Daggerlord on preserving the old ways of the EITC, as he was one of the very first leaders. Along with the position of Officer, he was given a role suiting to his resume, that of High Administration, which possesses the unique ability to overwrite parliament and turn down / remove Officers if they should deem them unworthy of serOrange Juice, and the wisdom of the High Administration legally cannot be questioned, as they lead the EITC when the current leader was a footsoldier. Since Black Mercenary began, no other guild has dared to challenge its validation is the one true EITC guild, and that is why peace was pursued with each and every nation, in order to use the connections to increase EITC trade and publicity, gaining Plup many kingly friends and nations who vouched for him. There have, however, been rogue pirate guilds who attempted to attack Black Mercenary, but were ultimately rolled over by its armada. Due to extensive training and organization, Black Mercenary's fleet was undefeated. Tensions between nations were very bad for Black Mercenary's publicity, because that means fewer opportunities for contracts, and fewer opportunities to showcase the EITC's power, which is why Black Mercenary has attempted to cease hostility to the best of its ability, representing Britain's interests. But what is even worse, however, is a guild attempting to poach the ideology of Black Mercenary, and rival its claim as the only EITC guild, which history has shown us is the only true weakness to a standing Black Guard. Unfortunately, this trespass ended up being committed by none other than the Dutch Republic, as evidenced arose that they were attempting to bring back a guild akin to the East India Co, Black Mercenary's predecessor. ''"by formal decree on behalf of my duties as Lord General of the Black Guard, it is my obligation as protector of the very last legacy of the EITC to ensure that a proper candle light must always be held up to its good name. It is for this reason that I must not only defend its values, but also its dignity. It is no secret that the CRP community stemmed from the ideology of EITC guilds - it is for that reason that the only true threat to a guild of such nature, is another guild attempting to take on its ideology. This has been prevalent throughout history, with the Co. Empire and Co. Black Guard serving as unfortunate examples. Any guild attempting to take on forms similar to the ideology of Black Mercenary is considered a trespass, and must be destroyed. The true battle for Black Mercenary was ensuring there were no other guilds of such nature, and that is why we have been so largely successful, allowing us to pursue peace with other nations, growing off of publicity alone. It is for this same reason that we pursued strong ties with the Dutch Republic, that is, until we were provided by numeros reports that, and I quote, you are attempting to structure yourselves into a "more autonomous East India Co." Evidence to this accusation will be provided in a screenshot below. Evidence to your nation's slander of the Black Guard and it's leader, on behalf of a former exile that you have allowed into your guild, one that you have previously served, which is a large sign of distrust, will also be provided in screenshot(s) below. But all of this would be forgiven, if attempts of poaching one of our officers was not pursued from day one, resulting in a nigh insidious and hurtful loss of a long time key member of our guild. It is evident by the fact that the Dutch Republic have been asked not once, but twice within the past month not to poach from our guild, and then proceeded to cause an Officer of all members to leave, on top of the guild's repeated slander to the values of the Black Guard, that the Dutch Republic is formally recognized as an enemy of state. You see a leaf fall, and you think you know which way the wind blows. Well, there is a storm coming, "Sir", that will take away your pride. A storm that will tear through your fleet, your cavalry, your cities, and will find its way directly to the chancellery of the Netherlands, where you will be laid bare for god himself alone to judge. May he have mercy on your wretched country." - ''Plup Daggerlord declaring war on the Dutch Republic, as a result of a trespass on Black Mercenary's rights to the EITC. Mommy then went on to speak with her father about the situation, providing evidence of crimes comitted by the Dutch Republic, and Black Mercenary's validation in the situation, and decided that instead of destroying their entire country for the crimes of their corrupt leaders, Plup Daggerlord would duel these leaders himself, representing the dignity of Black Mercenary, and its intolerance for such crimes. The fate of Plup Daggerlord Not caring what he had to do to ensure the stability of his guild ultimately caused key members to abandon him, due to the fact that he was willing to sacrifice his humanity to lead Seeing this, he made Nathaniel Scurvyskull of the High Administration, Guildmaster, who rebelled shortly after. Seeing that he could fix it still, he worked with The British Empire (sister guild) to get GM back from the traitor, which succeeded. He thought he could make up for his previous lack of transparency with Britain, as well as conspiring with other guilds during times of doubts, and even conspiring with Pearson Wright in the past, with this action. As an apology for making someone else GM, he then handed GM over to Johnny Goldtimbers, leader of the British Empire, and gave them the home discord of Black Mercenary in a display of trust, hoping he could ensure the survival of his guild, though realizing he deserved no forgiveness for starting the rebellion. But seeing members of Black Mercenary happy, and what he built flourish was his last bit of fulfillment, which is what he hoped to ensure the survival of when he helped stop the rebellion he started and gave TBE the discord, something which proved to not be good enough redemption in the eyes of many for them to give BM another chance under a responsible, voted leader, and not good enough of a reason to sway people from the conclusion that the entire guild of Black Mercenary should instead be dissolved, and obsorbed by TBE. Johnny Goldtimbers still being GM then democratically acted accordingly. ''It was then that Plup Daggerlord died of a stroke, fuming from his mouth while lying on the floor, jolting in each direction, possibly due to rage, or gag reflex, or both. Breakfasts were now Plup-Free. Mommy Goldtimbers then flung herself from highest elevation of the Red Keep, following the demise of her failure of a son, and loss of her grasp for power. EITC Ranks . 'God '. Jesus (pronounced Heyzeus) .' Sarge '. Lefttenant . 'CAPTAIN PLANET! '. 'Therapist '. Major . 'Half Bird '. 'Full Bird '. 'Chief Executive of the CIA '. Senator . 'Lt. Governor '. Governor .' Dick Cheney '. 'Sarah Palin '. 'Gibby from iCarly '. 'High Jamaicans '. Donald Trump HCOs: . GM: Plup Daggerlord (formerly) . Second - In - Command: Sir Flores (formerly) . Third - In - Command: Nakoma Wolf (formerly) Trivia Benedict has a sort of animalistic taste, or "subtly extra" as he refers to it, and likes to add touches of cringe to dull and bland - hence his nickname (Plup Daggerlord) as he is exceptionally skilled with daggers, but sought a way to balance out the fruitiness of this name by adding the word "Plup", giving more climax to the latter. Benedict calls everything "pixels". Benedict spends most of his time on the docks of Tortuga or Port Royal, screaming at the insect pirates far below him, so far below him they probably don't hear his cries. Between building a wall and creating a less toxic community, Benedict chose the wall. Titles Former General Manager of the Black Guard Former close adviser to the Lord Governor of the EITC (William Brawlmartin's reign) Former Second-in-Command of the EITC (Samuel Redbeard's reign) Former Third-in-Command of the EITC (Samuel Redbeard's reign) Former Lieutenant Colonel of the British Empire (Johnny Goldtimber's reign) Former Officer of the British Empire Quotes -''I'm in JROTC, that stands for Retards on the Campus, so you better not mess with me. I'm a future US Army Marine Veteran, you're gonna be thanking me for my service soon.'' -''What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.'' - Whatever stands in our way, we will eat it. - ''Lord Plup during the conquest of Tortuga. - ''We are the Black Guard, not the White Guard! ''- Plup Daggerlord on ordering the EITC to return to the old fight against the white man, as opposed to the white rule introduced by the Co. Empire - ''The best way to get the most out of someone is to hold a carrot on a stick over their head, never letting them know it's made out of plastic. - ''Lord Plup on his Discord. ''- Many people are smart individually, but in the masses they are gullible, which is why a leader is always required - someone who understands that only simple messages can be transmitted from person to person without breaking down, and who can mask these messages as methods of elvolving *evolving. ''- Life is already a gamble with every breath we take, why not purify the meaning?'' ''- It's always the ones whom make themselves seem perfect that turn out to be the worst of us.'' ''- Everyone's different fears can be narrowed down to the thought of death, that's why we fear them, making death everyone's greatest fear.'' ''- The stupidest rulers give no reasons for their harshness'' ''- To find out everything you need to know, you need to first reconcile what can never be known, that way you don't waste time on the abstract.'' ''- Glory is fuel, it doesn't matter where you derive it from.'' - A good leader sees things through the eyes of his men. - Look around you. For every inch of life that advances, an equal inch is chipped away by death - it's the only thing that's apparent, a balance only complexity can alter. Combine a strong mind with the infinite nature of the universe and any outcome is invited. Survival is what counts. My only goal is longevity through my contributions, while pursuing fulfillment along the way. I have deemed honored serOrange Juice as the high ground in terms of reaping potential benefits, and as for fulfillment, self expression fuels me - for that I need listeners. If people are incapable of admiring me, they are useless. Then there is glorification - for that I only need sheep. Anything that stands in the way of my fuel sources, I've come to be skilled at finding new and innovative ways to get rid of them - even people.